Samuel was taught in anger management classes that sometimes a trick to anger management is to avoid toxic people in your life-or at least minimize their presence or influence. Toxic people are people who are not good for you, yet you continue to be in relationship with them.
You can tell if someone is toxic for you if:
- they have the ability to consistently trigger anger in you, when other people don't.
- you don't like who you are or who you become when you interact with them.
- you have constant feelings of resentment toward them.
- they drain all your emotional resources in dealing with them.
Most of the time, you don't have to continue your relationship as is with people who simply are not good for you - even if they are relatives, co-workers, or neighbors.
You may not be able to avoid them completely, but you often can see them less often, give them less information about you (so they have less "ammunition"), stop confiding in them, or stop making personal sacrifices to please them.
Many psychologists feel that dealing differently with toxic people in your life is a sign of strong self-esteem and good mental health.