How many of us are looking for a man to make us feel good about ourselves? We think, “As soon as I get a man, I’ll be happy; my life will be perfect.”
This attitude reminds me of a quote: “Half a woman will attract half a man.” In other words, a woman who feels incomplete or inadequate will attract a man who is equally incomplete or inadequate.
Contrary to popular belief, relationships are not 50-50 propositions. We should enter into relationships as whole beings prepared to give (and receive) 100 percent.
So what does it mean to be whole? For starters, it doesn’t mean being perfect. Wholeness is a state of being. We reach this stage in life when we are no longer looking for someone or something to complete us. We’re whole once we realize we already possess everything we want or need on the inside of us. We come into a conscious awareness that there is no lack in our lives. We recognize that we are complete and no one can add to or take way anything from our life. In our wholeness, we know that our life is what we make it.
Therefore, a whole and complete woman doesn’t depend on others to make her feel good about herself. She doesn’t seek validation from others. Her sense of purpose, well-being and identity doesn’t come from anything outside of herself, including a relationship.
She is content with her life. She truly loves herself and manifests joy and happiness she desires. She doesn’t expect others to make her feel that way.
When you’re whole, you never say, “I’ll be happy when I have a man.” Instead you say, “Yes, I want a relationship. Even though I don’t have one right now, I will enjoy and love myself in this moment.”
The people we attract to our lives are a reflection of who we are. So if you want someone who will love and honor you, you must first love and honor yourself. A joyful, loving, healthy relationship begins with you.
Rosslyn Champ is a poet, author and teacher. She is the founder of http://liveloveandprosper.com Her personal development site offers a variety of articles, booklets and other resources that provide a holistic, common sense approach to helping people achieve success in all areas of life.