How would you define your current romantic relationship?
However you classify your romantic relationship, chances are high that you and your significant other fit into one of two relationship categories: Adult or Infantile.
No one wants to admit they are in a stage of infantile bliss, or even worse, infantile tantrum but many relationships actually reflect juvenile behavior. You however can make sure you avoid such “prittle-pattle” and enjoy the benefits of an adult relationship while still retaining a sense of the playful---a quality which despite what some may think is anything but childish.
So, what are the signs of an adult relationship?
The hallmarks of an adult relationship are as follows:
1) You Know You are in an Adult Relationship if... You've Stood the Test of Time
According to an online article1 entitled Stages of Relationships, the neurochemical, phenyl ethylamine, that you produce when you are initially falling in love will wear away after months. How many months? It may depend on the relationship, but until you've exited the “I always want to be with you,” “I need to bring her flowers,” “I need to make him dinner every night,” stages, you still have not entered the realm of an adult relationship regardless of how old you are.
2) You Know You are in an Adult Relationship if... You've Figured Out How to Be a Couple and Separate Individuals
Couples, especially after they exit the “You-are-the-most-perfect-person-I've-ever-met,” stage and who still care for each other enough to continue forward with the relationship have likely become a compact couple. If they also take time to maintain individual interests and pursuits they have become an adult couple.
3) You Know You are in an Adult Relationship if... You Feel Good about Yourself
Obviously, if your partner makes comments that cause you to wonder if you are actually worth anything, you have jumped into the deepest relationship ditch of them all. At all costs, get out of that relationship!
However, on the other hand, verbal or emotional abuse isn't always a problem that originates from a partner. You may perhaps be the kind of person who doesn't allow yourself to believe that he or she could really be interested in spending the rest of his or her life with you. If that's the case, you need to rethink a few basic principles. Seek counseling and find out more about what you can offer the world. No one should believe that he or she is not worth a healthy relationship.
4) You Know You are in an Adult Relationship if... You Maintain a Sense of Play|
Maturity and fun are not mutually exclusive. Couples with an adult relationship should strive to cultivate their sense of play. Adult play is the most attractive and alluring type of play.....especially for a romantic partner. A truly playful personality can let go of worries, intellectual concerns and is responsive to witticisms and banter. Reading in a broad range of topics, thinking positively and associating with a wide variety of individuals can often increase an individual's ability to be witty, clever and thus, playful. A sense of play does more to light the romantic fires than almost any other aspect of a relationship.
5) You Know You are in an Adult Relationship if... You See Faults but Don't Get Upset
After you exit the anti-gravity “phenyl ethylamine” stage, you might find that your partner's faults are readily apparent. If you decide not to become offended by his or her weaknesses or if you decide you are going to be willing to work past those weaknesses and see his or her positive qualities and you actually accomplish what you have decided to do, you will once again become an adult relationship winner.
6) You Know You are in an Adult Relationship if... You Find that Service is Not a Burden
If you have a desire to actually serve your partner (even put his or her needs above yourself) you've achieved a status of relationship that not many couples attain. Finding this type of love isn't something you can learn in an article. You have to discover it for yourself!
Marci Crane is a copywriter for Main10 in Orem, Utah. For information in regards to establishing an adult relationship, please feel free to contact Heavenly Matched